Life Positive and More

Airline Announcements [1] United Flight Attendant announced, 'People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it! [2] On landing, the stewardess said, 'Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have.' [3] 'There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane' [4] An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the Passengers exited, smile, and give them a 'Thanks for flying our airline.' He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. S he said, 'Sir, do yo...

Lovers of the English language, which most of you're for sure, might enjoy this.....    There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that word is "UP."   It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list,    but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP?    At a meeting, why does a topic come UP?    Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and    why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?    We call UP our friends And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver,  we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen.    We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car.    At other times the little word has real special meaning.    People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses.    To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.    And this UP is confusing - a drain must be ope...

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you , I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I can not accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the...

  ​ Suddenly a devil appeared and said,   "Drop something in the sea,  ONLY  if I could  find it,   I will eat you...  If I cant then  I will be your slave!"   American dropped a diamond...  Devil found it and ate him.    Russian dropped small platinum piece...  Devil found it and ate him too.  Now its Sindhi's turn.   Before knowing what Sindhi did,  take a moment to think  what would you do  Lets see if your thought meets  with that of our legendary Sindhi?   Sindhi opened a water bottle   and poured some water in the sea  "JAI JHULELALA"   and asked to find it.    Devil fainted!!  Slave of Sindhi !!!

Someone has written these beautiful words. One must read and try to understand the deep meanings in them. They are like the Ten Commandments to follow in life all the time. 1] Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble; it is a "steering wheel" that directs us in the right path throughout life.   2] Do you know why a car's WINDSHIELD is so large & the rear view mirror is so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE.      So, look ahead and move on.    3] Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write.    4] All things in life are temporary.  If going well enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going wrong don't worry, they can't last long either.     5] Old friends are like Gold! New friends are Diamonds! If you get a Diamond, don't forget the Gold!     Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a base of Gold!    6]  Often when we lose hope ...

A Policeman was walking down the street when he came upon a group of about a dozen boys, all of them between 10 and 12 years of age.  The group had surrounded a dog, concerned lest the boys were hurting the dog, he went over and asked "What are you doing with that dog?"  One of the boys replied, "This dog is just an old neighborhood stray, we all want him, but only one of us can take him home.  So we've decided that whichever one of us can tell the biggest lie will get to keep the dog."  Of course, the Reverend was taken aback. "You boys shouldn't be having a contest telling lies!" he exclaimed.  He then launched into a ten minute sermon against lying, beginning, "Don't you boys know it's a sin to lie," and ending with, "Why, when I was your age, I never told a lie."  There was dead silence for about a minute.  Just as the Reverend was beginning to think he'd gotten through to them, the smallest boy gave a de...