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Showing posts from October, 2009

Spellings?? My foot!! - This is fantastic

Only great minds can read this This is weird, but interesting! fi yuo  cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too Cna yuo raed tihs?  Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.  The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it

Some very Good and Very bad things ...

The most destructive habit......................Worry The greatest Joy...............................Giving The greatest loss................Loss of self-respect The most satisfying work...............Helping others The ugliest personality trait.............Selfishness The most endangered species.........Dedicated leaders Our greatest natural resource...............Our youth The greatest "shot in the arm"..........Encouragement The greatest problem to overcome.................Fear The most effective sleeping pill........Peace of mind The most crippling failure disease............Excuses The most powerful force in life..................Love The most dangerous pariah..................A gossiper The world's most incredible computer........The brain The worst thing to be without................... Hope The deadliest weapon.......................The tongue The two most power-filled words..............."I Can" The greatest asset..............................Faith ...

A very, very hilarious account of our great Indian Traffic....

Subject: A very, very hilarious account of our great Indian Traffic....   This was written by a visitor from Baan, Netherlands, after having spent two years in Hyderabad. Driving in India: For the benefit of every Tom, Dick and Harry visiting India and daring to drive on Indian roads, I am offering a few hints for survival. They are applicable to every place in India except Bihar, where life outside a vehicle is only marginally safer. Indian road rules broadly operate within the domain of karma where you do your best, and leave the results to your insurance company. The hints are as follows: Do we drive on the left or right of the road? The answer is 'both'. Basically you start on the left of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess. Just trust your instincts, ascertain the direction, and proceed. Adherence to road rules leads to much misery and occasional fatali...

Roles in Heaven as per Management Guy

  Brahma Systems Installation   Vishnu   Systems Administration & Support    Lakshmi Finance and Accounts consultant  Saraswati Training and Knowledge Management    Shiva DBA (Crash Specialist)   Ganesh Quality Assuarance & Documentation  Narada Data transfer    Yama Reorganization & Downsizing Consultant    Chitragupta IDP & Personal Records    Apsaras Downloadable Viruses  Devas Mainframe Programmers    Surya  Solaris Administrator    Rakshasas In house Hackers   Ravan ! ;Internet Explorer WWWF Lakshman  Support Software and Backup   Hanuman Linux/s390 Jatayu Firewall    Dronacharya System Programmer   Vishwamitra Sr. Manager Projects  Valmiki  Technical Writer (Ramayana Sign off document)   Krishna SDLC ( Sudarshan Wheel Development Life Cycle ) Arjun  Lead Programmer (all companies are vying for him)   Abhimanyu Trainee Programmer    Draupadi  Motivation & Team building    Bhima MAINFRAME LEGACY SYSTEM    Duryodhana  Microsoft product Written...

Age of Man

God created the donkey and said to him. "You will be a donkey. You will work un-tiringly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years." The donkey answered: "I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is much. Give me only 20 years" God granted his wish. ******* God created the dog and said to him: "You will guard the house of man. You will be his best Friend. You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 30 years. You will be a dog. " The dog answered: "Sir, to live 30 years is too much,give me only 15 years." God granted his wish. ******* God created the monkey and said to him: "You will be a monkey. You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks. You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. " The monkey answered: "To live 20 years is too much, give me only 10 years." God granted his wish. ******* Finally God create...

Mother's Value. Worth reading

For all mothers...   After having reached at the peak of his career a man felt an urge to repay back to his mother for all that she had done for him.So he asked her, "Mother, what can I give you? What can I do for you? I sincerely want to repay you for all the sacrifices you have made for me and for all the love you have showered upon me. "Mother looked surprised and said, "Why do you think about it. It was my duty so I did it, you don't have to repay me. Even if you want  to, there is no way a man can ever repay his mother." Despite her continuous refusal to ask for anything, he continued to Persist. To put an end to the discussion, she said, "All right. If  you must, then tonight you sleep on my bed, with me, just as you used to when you were a baby." He said, "That's a strange thing to ask for, but if  it pleases you, I will." As soon as he fell asleep, the mother got up and brought a bucket of water. She poured a mug full of water...

2 -Morals-WORTH NOTING

A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands their money. Once he was given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replied, "Yes sir, I did." The robber then shot him in the temper, killing him instantly. He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?" The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did!"                     Moral- When Opportunity knocks....  ===========================================================   Training program for top management.   A well-known motivational speaker gathering the entire crowd's attention,said, "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife !" The crowd was shocked! He followed up by saying, "That woman was my mother!" The crowd burst into laughter and he gave his speech, which was well...

Risk factor in Professional's life style - Excellent Safety Talk

This e-mail received from a person working in a Software Company   Dear colleagues, I am working in Blore Software City .... I wanted to share an incident of my life with you, hoping that it may be an eye opener to you so that you can live more years. On 27th October afternoon, I had severe heart attack symptom and I was rushed to the hospital. After reaching to the hospital, the doctors prescribed a test called angiogram. This test is basically to identify blood flow of heart arteries. When they finished the test they found a 94% block in the main artery. At this point, I wanted to share my living style, which has caused this block in my heart arteries. Please see the below points of my life style, if any of these points are part of your life style then you are at risk, please change yourselves.   1.     I was not doing any physical exercise for more than 10 years , not even walking 30 minutes a day for years . 2.     My food ti...

Bank Crisis -The financial crisis explained

Bank Crisis in Terms I Can Understand  The financial crisis explained in simple terms.............................  Heidi is the proprietor of a bar in Berlin . In order to increase sales,she decides to allow her loyal customers - most of whom are unemployed alcoholics - to drink now but pay later. She keeps track of the drinks consumedon a ledger (thereby granting the customers loans).  Word gets around and as a result increasing numbers of customers floodinto Heidi's bar.  Taking advantage of her customers' freedom from immediate paymentconstraints, Heidi increases her prices for wine and beer, the most-consumed beverages. Her sales volume increases massively. A young and dynamic customer service consultant at the local bank recognizes these customer debts as valuable future assets and increases Heidi's borrowing limit. He sees no reason for undue concern since he has the debts of the alcoholics as collateral. At the bank's corporate headquarters, exper...

Best joke in Britian

A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, 'You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Habour, get outta here.' The astonished Chinese man replied, 'It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour , it was the Japanese'. 'Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese, you're all the same,' replied Spielberg. In return, the Chinese gives Spielberg a slap and says, 'You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that ship.' Shocked, Spielberg replies, 'It was the iceberg that sank the ship, not me.' The Chinese replies, 'Iceberg, Spielberg, Carlsberg, you're all the same.' ( This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a  competition organized in Britain ) -- ====Read inspiring small stories at my website at http://www.lifeplan.co.nr/ . Leave a comment at the l...

A great Story

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because the re in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other 20 children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big 'F' at the top of his papers. At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise. Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, 'Teddy ...

LIFE IS ABOUT CORRECTING MISTAKES

Monica married Hitesh this day. At the end of the wedding party, Monica's mother gave her a newly opened bank saving passbook. With Rs.1000 deposit amount. Mother: 'Monica, take this passbook. Keep it as a record of your  marriage life. When there's something happy and memorable happened in your new  life, put some money in. Write down what it's about next to the line. The more memorable the event is, the more money you can put in. I've done the first one for you today. Do the others with Hitesh.When you look back after years, you can know how much happiness you've had.' Monica shared this with Hitesh when getting home. They both thought it was a great idea and were anxious to know when the second deposit can be made. This was what they did after certain time: - 7 Feb: Rs.100, first birthday celebration for Hitesh after marriage - 1 Mar: Rs.300, salary raise for Monica - 20 Mar: Rs.200, vacation trip to Bali - 15 Apr: Rs.2000, Monica got pregnant - 1...

Born Free, Taxed to death

A little boy wanted Rs 50 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Finally he decided to write God a letter requesting the Rs 50. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, they decided to forward it to the Prime Minister as a joke. The Prime Minister was so amused, that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy Rs 30. The Prime Minister thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the Rs 30, and decided to write a thank you note to God, which reached the Prime Minister and it read: "Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that you sent it through the 7 Race Course Road and those donkeys deducted Rs 20 for taxes" -- ====Read inspiring small stories at my website at http://www.lifeplan.co.nr/ . Leave a comment at the line "comment" at the bottom of any story you like. You can also SUBSCRIBE FREE at the website so that new...

True Leader -A STORY.

A TRUE LEADER IS A PERSON WHO RESPONDS SPONTANEOUSLY TO SITUATIONS. HE IS FRESH IN HIS IDEAS AND CONTINUOUSLY KEEPS HIMSELF ALIVE. There was a great war between two countries. On a hot afternoon, a man in civilian clothes was riding past a small group of soldiers digging a huge pit , doing a seemingly impossible task. The group leader was shouting orders and threatening of punishments, if the work was not completed in an hour. The man riding the horse stopped and asked "Sir, Why can't you help them yourself ? ". The group leader replied. "I am the leader. The men obey as I command them. If you feel so strong , go and help them". The man worked with the soldiers till the job was finished. Before leaving , he said to the leader. " The next time your status prevents you from supporting your people, inform your immediate boss.I will provide a more permanent solution". The group leader was completely taken aback. Only now he realised that the man...

Balance sheet of Life

BALANCE SHEET OF LIFE Our Birth is our Opening Balance! Our Death is our Closing Balance! Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities Our Creative Ideas are our Assets Heart is our Current Asset Soul is our Fixed Asset Brain is our Fixed Deposit Thinking is our Current Account Achievements are our Capital Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade Friends are our General Reserves Values & Behaviour are our Goodwill Patience is our Interest Earned Love is our Dividend Children are our Bonus Issues Education is Brands / Patents Knowledge is our Investment Experience is our Premium Account The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately. The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award. -- ====Read inspiring small stories at my website at http://www.lifeplan.co.nr/ . Leave a comment at the line "comment" at the bottom of any story you like. You can also SUBSCRIBE FREE at the website so that new stories will reach automatically to your mailbox. Just...